What a week it was, all the same. While Tom Brady was signing cards of himself with an Expos uniform on his back, Bill Belichick had to deal with rumors of his firing.
It’s never a good idea to hang on for nothing. In this regard, there are many examples: Franco Harris and Jerry Rice are two of them, without forgetting Pepsi Crystal, which remained on the shelves for quite too long.
Was this magic coming through the hands of handsome Tom? Probably. After all, Brady left for three seasons in Tampa, and came back with a new Super Bowl ring on his fingers. During those three years, Belichick went 25-25, and his club played in just one playoff game, in which it suffered a memorable 30-point romp against the Bills.
In Mac Jones, Belichick believed he had found another Brady, but less handsome. Except that this season, the Patriots offense produces an average of 12.8 points per game. It’s a disaster, and Jones found himself on the sidelines so often, holding a tablet and contemplating the meaning of life. Added to this is a never-ending list of bad draft picks.
This explains that. In Foxboro, Good Bill’s Hood has been part of the landscape for a while; for 24 years, to be exact. With Brady at his side, Belichick seemed eternal in all his arrogance and self-importance, refusing to answer questions that didn’t suit him, sometimes attempting to bend the rules to his advantage.
But to quote Axl Rose, nothing lasts forever, and today Belichick finds himself staring blankly, trying to cling to the remains of a dynasty that is nothing more than a distant memory.
It’s sad, but not that much.
We’re not going to say it too loudly, but finally, the New York Giants may have found themselves a quarterback. Maybe.
The Giants have been looking for this rare gem since Eli’s retirement, and again, Eli is probably the luckiest quarterback in the history of mankind, having played a good eight weeks of football in his life but who collected two rings.
Anyway, here comes Tommy DeVito, 25 years old, a character straight out of the movie My Cousin Vinny, never drafted, who still lives with his parents, as if this story wasn’t already good enough as it is.
Since all the Giants’ quarterbacks this season have been either injured, or lousy, or both, this Tommy finds himself living the dream, while his father, a plumber by profession, unclogs sinks in the area .
This film writes itself. In the meantime, DeVito is doing what no other quarterback since Eli has been able to do in New York: winning.
We will take this moment to offer our apologies to Joe Flacco, who was doubted for reasons of bad faith. But the Browns quarterback is defying everyone, coming back from a game with more than 300 yards and three touchdowns against the Jaguars.
It’s funny, but at 38 years old, and in the short term, he arguably offers the best chance of success for the Browns, who have employed about 50 different quarterbacks over the past three years. This is not something we had planned.
Apart from that, regulars of this column know our legendary contempt for outdoor soccer, and it is with a certain discouragement that we notice an increasingly high number of comedians on real football fields this season. Just last Sunday evening, some Eagles defensive players performed so many pirouettes to try to attract a penalty that we thought they were auditioning for Les Grands Ballets Canadiens. This has to stop.
Also, it’s true, the New York Jets won last Sunday, and they probably deserve an apology, but it’s not going to happen.
Time flies, ladies gentlemen, and there are only four weeks of play left in our beloved NFL, and as Simone de Beauvoir liked to say, it is at the end of the evening that we recognize the best dancers.
For the moment anyway, the Dallas Cowboys are dancing very well, but we are all very eager to see them go to Buffalo on Sunday, where the cold, the muddy conditions and the smells can ruin a visit. Also, the Ravens will be in Jacksonville, and the Eagles will try to recover from last Sunday’s loss by going to Seattle on Monday night.
There was no mention of Taylor Swift in this column and you can send your usual congratulations to the same address.
