Let’s not beat around the bush, or even beat three or five: things are going bad for the Kansas City Chiefs.
That’s what it is. Among the billions of readers who devour this column, there must be half who had the Chiefs as favorites for the next Super Bowl. But tomorrow is another day, as Pat Burns would say, and today the Chiefs face the cruel reality of an uncertain future.
Before writing Taylor Swift’s name to attract clicks and, incidentally, millions of dollars, we’ll instead suggest another, more obvious, fact to explain all this: the Chiefs are no longer able to put her in.
Add to that the blunders, the errors of all kinds – no one in this league misses as many passes as the Chiefs –, and perhaps also an ordinary season from Patrick Mahomes.
The wizard quarterback hasn’t suddenly become bad, but his 91.7 efficiency rating puts him 16th among NFL regulars in this regard, a far cry from Brock Purdy’s (112. 2) San Francisco 49ers. On his defense, Mahomes must throw balls to Rashee Rice, Justin Watson and Skyy Moore. There’s no one in there who’s going to the Hall of Fame, let’s face it.
So this is it. With two games remaining, the Chiefs remain atop their division, and barring a disaster as big as that time Coke tried to make new Coke, they should be able to win that title. Then, in the playoffs, however, it could be more complicated.
Taylor Swift is going to have to start catching passes.
The most erudite among us know that NFL means Not For Long, and poor Tommy DeVito just learned it the hard way. The New York Giants will start Tyrod Taylor behind center on Sunday against the Los Angeles Rams, which means the 25-year-old quarterback who lives with his parents in New Jersey’s 15 minutes of fame is over. It’s lucky he doesn’t have a mortgage in his name.
It appears that Trevor Lawrence has a damaged shoulder, but this young man can console himself by examining his perfect hair.
But the big story comes to us from Denver, where the Broncos will leave Russell Wilson on the bench on Sunday against the Chargers, while Jarrett Stidham will be in charge. We take this opportunity to recall that the Broncos offered Wilson the tidy sum of $245 million over five years in 2022. Pretty sure the guy who signed this check is starting to have regrets.
Besides, what would another week be without another Aaron Rodgers rant? This time, the New York Jets quarterback accused “conspirators” of wanting to portray him as selfish because he occupies a spot on his club’s 53-man roster even if he doesn’t play.
It’s fabulous and it’s a bit like the Milli Vanilli guys accused Cardi B of not singing for real.
Since the success of this column is now measured from Brossard to Bombay, the email box no longer provides, and we take this opportunity to thank you for your patience, because your call is important to us.
Thus, Yves Gagné reminds us that with “the Cowboys, you never know what to expect from them”, which is false, since the fans of this team can expect to see their hopes dashed in a manner a little more cruel each time the month of January returns.
Then, there is Alain Myette who reproaches us for not quoting Leibniz sufficiently, and indeed, from memory, this gentleman has not already written that “there is no way to satisfy those who want to know the whys and whys? A direct reference to Buffalo Bills fans, if you ask us.
Finally, a certain Nelly writes to us to tell us that she is now a widow and that she is looking for someone with whom to share her wealth. We’ll come back to that.
There are only two weeks of play left before we move on to the playoffs and get down to business, and in the meantime, we can fall back on a few gems to keep us going.
So, don’t miss it: Lions at Dallas on Saturday night, Dolphins at Baltimore on Sunday – by the way, is there a better club than the Ravens in this league right now? – and the Bengals at the Chiefs.
Can we take this opportunity to write Taylor Swift’s name another time? Yes we can.